I Used To Be [insert adjective here]

 So I just re-read some old posts of mine and I used to be funny. I used to write about things like dreaming about transvestites and working at a desk job and it was kind of funny. And occasionally it was good, too, like that time I wrote about my break-up with New York, or the time I wrote that weird dialogue. I'm enjoying the whole Reverb10 thing, it's allowing for a lot of reflection, but it's not allowing for the same "creative freedom" that I used to have on this blog. Whatever that means.

I want to keep doing Reverb10 through the end of the year, like I said I would, but I'm going to try and go back to my old ways and write some interesting stuff again. The blog has felt a bit "needy" and self-indulgent lately. So, tomorrow expect something better. I hope...

December 19 – Healing. What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011? (Author: Leonie Allan)

I don't know how to answer this. Not one bit. What healed me? I guess trusting my instincts? Does that work? I wish I could say that it was a witch doctor or a German physicist or something ridiculous, but probably just trusting myself. I'd be going crazy right now if I didn't trust that the decisions I've made over the course of the last year weren't the wrong ones.

In 2011 I'd like to be healed further in this regard. I want to be able to fully trust myself.

This question confuses me. I think you need to be a little bit more broken to be healed and I don't feel broken yet...I feel discombobulated and detached, but not broken.

It's Sunday, I can't get my thoughts to congeal.

A